Ah. Nothing like going to write cards, and discovering that one is down to two cards. And little wrapping paper.

I guess I'm stopping to get cards tomorrow after work. I had planned to go to the mall anyway, but this just confirms the necessity for a trip.

On the upside, it has been 10 years since I bought most cards. I was due to run out eventually.

Here's How to Feel Old

Watch "I Love the 80s" on VH1.

Damnit! I remember when these things were popular.

Dear Abby:

Let's have this conversation again, since the furbrain tends to forget.

You have to wear Soft Paws because sometimes it's hard for you to remember that good kitties don't scratch on the couch or the carpeting. You have to have your nails clipped before the Soft Paws go on, so that Mommy doesn't have to do this as often.

This process also involves clipping your back nails, since you refuse to let Mommy touch your back feet to put Soft Claws on back there. If you thrash around, it will take longer. Likewise, it will also increase the risk of what happened tonight, when a kitty moves at the same time Mommy is clipping, and your quick gets cut.

Love,

The Human. Who may not have sharp claws, but has weight and height on you.

Dear Abby:

The nice, warm cocoa that Mommy has on the floor next to the big chair is not yours. It is not yours for two reasons:

1) It's much too hot for little kitties to drink.

2) You do not get to drink the cocoa that gets imported from England. It's mine!

Love,

Mom